East Coast transfer student Tai Frasier may have been clueless when she showed up at Beverly Hill High just aching for a makeover, but the folks at Rockwell prove themselves masterful movie spoofers once again with their riotous, rollicking latest, The Unauthorized Musical Parody Of Clueless.

Writer-director Amy Heckerling breathed new life into the then dormant ‘80s-era teen romcom—and made a star out of Alicia Silverstone in the bargain—when she updated Jane Austen’s Emma for the big screen back in 1995, and now, twenty-three years later, writer-executive producer Kate Pazakis’s UMPO series pokes affectionate fun at the movie original while spicing it up with a show-opening “Kids In America,” a grand finale “Time Of My Life,” and plenty of ‘90s classics like “I Touch Myself,” “MMMBop,” and “Barbie Girl” in-between.

 Clueless fans will relish being reunited with beautiful blonde matchmaker Cher Horowitz (Anna Grace Barlow), her African-American bestie Dionne (Janaya Mahealani Jones), her newly arrived other besite Tai (Nohely Quiroz), and her thankfully blood-unrelated step-brother Josh (Matthew Bohrer), along with stoner Travis and mystery man Christian (Zack Colonna), class hottie Elton, Dad Mel, and nerdy prof Mr. Hall (Marqell Clayton), snotty bitch Amber, ditzy schoolmarm Miss Geist, and tsk-tsking maid Lucy (Lesley McKinnell), and if you’re wondering what happened to Dionne’s supercool boyfriend Murray, well the name may be the same but he is now a she, giving Courtney Bruce the chance to play not one but two same-sex oriented characters, the other being gym teacher Ms. Stoger.

 Add to that Clueless’s now iconic catchphrases (“As if, “I’m audi,” “a total Betty,” “a full-on Monet,” and “Whatever,” the latter with accompanying hand-gesture W), scenes burned into our collective memory (a jeep-driving Cher “totally pausing” at stop signs, our heroine’s passionate defense of the Hayteeyans, the Valley shindig that had Cher and her posse “Rollin’ With My Homies,” Dionne’s terrorific freeway drive, and the convenience store parking lot robbery that had Cher uttering an unforgettable “You don’t understand, this is an Alaïa!”), and show-stopping renditions of “We Didn’t Start The Fire,” “I’m Too Sexy,” “Xanadu,” and the sing-and-dance-alongable “I Wanna Dance With Somebody,” and you’ve got one of UMPO’s most all-around entertaining musical parodies ever.

 Scripter Pazakis once again finds ways to ways to make her unauthorized spoof both reverential and raunchy. (The poem Miss Geist’s “secret admirer” sends her now reads “Roses are red, violets are blue. I want to kiss your lips, and the ones on your mouth too.”)

Particular aim is taken at Trump-supporting right-wing-extremist Dionne originator Stacey Dash, who’s not only diving for muffs this time round but spouts lines like “fuck the Dreamers, we need to build a wall.” Ouch.

 And speaking of same-sex orientation, while the movie’s Christian took his time in revealing his ho-mo-sex-u-al-i-ty, the BH High bad boy now screams gay from the get-go (“The bitch is back. Christian is in the house!”), and if the pink pom-pom-shaking twink’s announcement that he’s heading off to a sing-along Wizard Of Oz at the Abbey doesn’t register on Cher’s gaydar, Rockwell audiences are likely to find themselves a whole lot less clueless.

 Jimmy Smagula makes a splashy, flashy UMPO debut, eliciting delish star turns from his cast of Rockwell regulars and newbies headed by a perfectly cast Barlow doing her best Alicia Silverstone while belting out a storm along the way.

Jones sizzles as Dionne, Bohrer smolders as Josh, and Quiroz positively explodes as the elastic-bodied, pratfalling Tai, with Bruce’s butch bruiser bombshell doing Queen Latifah proud.

 Colonna’s fabulously flamboyant Christian flaming with the best of them after having vanished into Trevor’s hundred-percent-hetero slacker skin.

 Clayton and McKinnell delight throughout, and not just together as hot-to-trot middle-agers Mr. Hall and Miss Geist but individually as (he) a dreamy Elton and a harumphing Dad and (she) a snooty Amber and a perpetually hysterical Lucy. (“¡Incesto!”)

 Ace choreographer Mallory Butcher and master musical director Gregory Nabours get the above-mentioned triple-threats singing and dancing up a storm on just about every inch of Rockwell Table & Stage (backed by Nick Healy on piano, Emily Rosenfield on guitar, Blake Estrada on bass, and Gregory Sadler on drums).

 Production/costume designer Chadd McMillan recreates iconic Clueless looks to perfection, from Cher’s plaid blazer-and-mini combo to Amber’s mondo-bizarro wear to Dionne’s (over-the-)top hat that now reads “Make America Great Again.” (Thank you Stacey Dash.)

Additional production design kudos go to BJ Marchini’s sound design mix and Joey Guthman’s flashy lighting.

 Brian Dare is director’s assistant. Ashley Balderrama is production coordinator. McMillan is technical director and production stage manager and Quiroz is assistant stage manager. Alternating with the cast reviewed are Ashley Argota, Garrett Clayton, Lucas Coleman, Desi Dennis-Dylan, Jason Heymann, Natalie Lander, Domonique Paton, and Morgan Smith.

From hit-movie-turned-cult-classic to 3-season TV sitcom to 21-volume young adult novel series to Unauthorized Musical Parody, Clueless is still going strong at age 23. Spend an evening with Cher, Dionne, Tai, Josh, and the gang at Rockwell and you’ll see why.

Rockwell Table & Stage, 1714 N. Vermont, Los Angeles.
www.rockwell-la.com

–Steven Stanley
May 11, 2018
Photos: Brian Carpender

Tags: Los Angeles Theater Review, Rockwell Table & Stage